Let Nature Takes Its Course

I guess the last 2 days were the lowest point of my life that i can recall. Really depressed and restless. Upset by the pain and the ongoing medications + vits that i need to take. Glad that i am feeling better after sharing and examing the situation with dear dear. True enough i guess at the back of my mind, i simply cannot accept the state that i am in now. Not working, not contributing, no baby and falling sick some more, means can't do much hsehold chores. So simply useless.

But dear dear encourages me to see this as a privilege to be able to stay at home and not work. With a single income we can still uphold the house & exps. One thing he said really encouraged me. While we were chatting, we began to explore solutions. So he asked if my bank had $1 million dollar, will i get better? Though not fully well but i guess i will be better as i do not hv to worry abt the bills, contributions. Then come to realise the problem is not big aft all so do not need to be discourage. Just take things as it goes.

Along our travel on the road for dinner last night, we sang in the car. He began to sing "There is no problem too big, God cannot solve it..there is no sorrow too deep that God cannot soothe it". Indeed, if i compare myself with other less fortunate, i m so much better. Dear dear asked me, if i can choice btw a blind auntie who sells tissue or the current me, who wld i choose? I wld choose the latter one. And that's it. I am so much fortunate.

Also thru our sharing and singing, how much he may not like Nav for some reasons, SP Nav has really did a gd job building our foundations. The songs, verses and teachings aint most of them fr Nav?

Today dear dear also reminded me to take hard as his mother was also like me when she was younger. She was weaker than me, or worse off as he said. It took her 10 years to be the healthy her today. So nothing is impossible nor hopeless. And somehow when i am discouraged to read the bible, God has his way to show me His way. Thru my friend's friendster yest, I saw this that really encourages me "When there is no way, open new ways; when there is no hope, find new hope". So it is never hopeless.

Hence, will continue to press on, learn to accept myself. Oh ya, dear dear took a pic of me and said "ok, this is a pic of your lowest point in life, and this'll be past"

This morning, we went for a nature walk, wanted to wake up at 7am but we were too tired and woke at 9.40am instead. Yet still decided to go. Why? Becos i read fr some health article that the air molecules are very dense in rainforest and they carry gd oxygen + other elemts that is good for the brain. So we went. As you can see from my dear dear's blog, we only walk a short distance, maybe 800m. Didn't continue as there is another 1km to the suspension bridge not forgetting still need to come back. By then it wld be noon! Despite the short dist, we enjoyed the walk. I just like trees and greenaries, so does dear dear. As usual, my legs will get red and itchy becos the grass emits some sort of element that my skin is allegic to. Luckily that happen only when on the way back to the car hee. Oh ya, saw the 'no dog' signage. Sad that Toby can't join us but for the sake of the nature reserve, we can always bring him somewhere else.

Oh ya, its always our desire that we can stay in Switzerland, Interlaken, a laidback town with mountains as backdrop and rivers and trains as walkways. Just enjoy the peace & transquility. A pic we took while we were there.

Thereaft, went back to spend time with Toby and bath for him. Dear dear suggested that i shld bath hime maybe twice a week since he goes for walks often. Ya true, shld do so. Wiping his body aft every walk may not be clean enough.

At night, went back to my pil's place for dinner. Today, my mil prepared steamboat. Nice ;) Aft which watched Phantom of the Opera on channel 5. Never expected myself to be hooked to it but i did. Didn't manage to catch the ending as dear dear wanted to go back home. Hee we didn't go hm, instead we went to 'Bottle Tree Park'. Just drove thru the park as it was privately owned for fishing & dining purposes, so did not get down as Toby was with us. Along the way to the park, I saw the pet qurantine centre (Sembawang), so is this the place where dogs get quarantine? No idea?

When we reached hm, cleaned Toby and we went out again. Downstairs had pasang palam (correct spelling?) so went to take a look. Understood why dear dear treasured wkends so much, he laughed and said now then i understood. Just wanna spent time with loved ones doing things we liked then staying at hm sleeping. He said we got weekdays to sleep. True if i hv the energy, i will cherish every moment of my weekends with dear dear & toby.

Unknowingly, i wrote so long again. Love Toby & love dear dear. Here are some pics of my dear boy boy while we were downstairs on last Fri. I unleashed him to roam ard while i juz sat there at look at the trees & sky. Hee he too. Hearing for any sound. Juz glad that he is aware tt he can't go too far away fr me. And he always by my side.